Have Yourself A Little Merry X'Mas

December 25th, 2008

Today is X'Mas Day....alot of preparation during the "big"day, x'mas songs heard everywhere, stores, malls, and alot of streets played X'Mas song, x'mas decorations...wouw i think everywhere looked so X'Mas :D

Everywhere felt X'Mas...except inside my heart! So tragic...isn't it?! Alot of things happens during x'mas day...lost few persons and found the others, persons that you never think could bring all the memories into your life back again...

I made reviews of my life for this year, and it surprise me, i found alot of things that shocked the hell of me, few made me sad, few made me smile and happy, and few made me just frozen...

Here they were:

October :
Starting this month my mom get sick, she got diabethic and got high, so need stayed at hospital, after that she got fall cos she couldn't manage her step then she couldn't walk and needs theraphiest... after that she went to the hospital several times cos her diabethic.... 3 months she doesn't able to walk.... but since two weeks ago my mom got massage and now slowly she could move her right leg again, and the great thing was she was bale to attend X'Mas Celebration at the church...

By The End of November:
Got surprise that my childhood first love struck again...woouww, and this time i don't know what to do!I kept this feeling morethan 20 years ~moreless~ After i lost sum1 so dearly last June my days so empty and lost, i went hang around with few guys but not for seriously only for fun, then he showed up... out of the blue! The feeling back again, i tried to hold it harder but i think he's too damn hot tobe not to pay attention! But like the old days, my stupidity, he's alread has sum1...no..no.. he's belongs to sum1, and this time i can't just "jump" like that into the situation and got off that easily... He foundout about my feeling, suprise... he said YES! i try again to free my self from this conditional love but.... i just don't know...!!!
Still in touch until now with him... just wait and see...

December:
Ho..ho..ho..ho.. X'MAs time!
for these few months i had this "like feeling" to this guy, well... it started since last december, but he's too young for me! along the days i realise perhaps i just like him no more, but yes i wis he showed up again this X'Mas eve... and the prayes has been answered... Just when i need sum1 to brighten up a little bit of my X'Mas eve there he was...even now he's already has girl friend but im glad i could accepted his visit only as a friend...
But i won't forget his look wen he stared at me and singing a song, his smile and his cute little face that he's got...girl's heartbreaker...
"thank's for coming dear..."

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE